Opening Up to You


An original work of fiction. Please do not reproduce without permission.

It’s been – what — 10 months that we’ve been working together? That’s close to a year of showing up for boring meetings, working on joint projects our two departments run and, much more pleasurably, occasionally hanging out socially. I wonder how many hours we’ve spent in each other’s company?

I’ve always felt relaxed around you, never had to worry about you suddenly making a move on me. You know I’m in a relationship with someone else and respect those boundaries. That’s not usual you know. I’m so tired of guys hitting on me even when they know about my boyfriend. So there’s been no real tension on my part, we really are just colleagues, just friends.

Of course I’ve known all along that your interest in me has always been there. No matter how much a man tries to hide his attraction to me, I can always tell. I see it in the way you greet me every morning with genuine pleasure. It’s there in how you mumble a joke under your breath to me when we’re both unwilling participants in a particularly tedious meeting.

And isn’t it surprising (not!) that in those meetings your chair somehow always ends up positioned next to mine? It’s been fun sharing a coffee break here and there, or happening on you at lunchtime in the cafeteria, and just talking, laughing, not feeling uncomfortable when we both fall silent for a while.

Of course I remember that time last Christmas when the whole department went out for a drink after work and you found me in a quiet spot in the bar? You were clearly pretty high but I still recall what you said.

“I just want you to know that I think you’re really fantastic and I hope your boyfriend knows what an incredibly lucky guy he is. If you ever do find yourself unattached you only have to call.”

It could have come across as you ignoring those unofficial boundaries we have but it didn’t feel that way. I took it just as a genuine appreciation of me. You’ve probably forgotten you ever said it but I haven’t. And lately your words have been more and more on my mind.

Over the months we’ve become pretty good friends. I like how you check in at work to tell me you’re going to get coffee and would I like some too? I like the way you ask me how I’m doing each day and somehow it doesn’t sound formulaic; you always seem to be genuinely interested in my response. And sometimes after work we’ve even taken in new movies that we both wanted to see — always with no pressure from you – and then gone for a quick drink afterwards to talk about the film.

But I love the most how you make me laugh. You’re quick and witty and you get a kick out of seeing that I’m genuinely amused. You hear me laugh at something you say and immediately declare “my work is done here” before ambling back to your desk. It’s nice to know I have someone dedicated to making me laugh, someone who wants me to feel good about my day, who expects nothing in return. I feel very seen, very appreciated.

And I know that behind all the banter, jokes and chats there’s always that faint longing for me. It’s like I can feel it coming off your body. It’s nothing you ever say, and nothing you ever do, at least in any explicit way. But there’s something behind your eyes, something in the intensity of your focus on me that tells me you’ve not lost the pull of the physical attraction I know you have for me.

I remember so clearly when you walked into our offices for the first time. You turned your head to meet me and I saw your eyes momentarily widen. A slight flush come into your cheeks. That faint huskiness in your voice when you said ‘hello’ was a big tell. You were struggling to keep your reaction hidden from and I’m sure no one else saw anything going on, but I caught the intensity of your attention.

So it was no surprise when, only a few days after meeting me, you asked me out. Of course given my status at the time I had to tell you I was in a relationship. You were so quick to apologize and started to chastise yourself for not checking my Facebook page. If you’d just done that simple thing, you exclaimed, you wouldn’t have put me in an embarrassing position.

It was sweet to see your confusion and watch you trying quickly to move back to talking in a jokey way. You didn’t push any more, there was no more pressure – just a quick apology and then back to business as usual.

Well my friend you don’t know it but that moment of my being unattached has finally arrived.

My Facebook status still says ‘in a relationship’ but I’m really lying to the world, keeping at bay all those tiresome guys who check my profile out online after they’ve seen me at the office.

Over the last few months the relationship I’ve had with my boyfriend has become long distance in every sense of that phrase. We’ve become increasingly separated emotionally as well as physically and seem gradually to be losing interest in each other. Neither of us is making much effort to keep things going.

In fact, afyon seks hikayeleri it’s been so low energy between us that there’s not even been a formal split. But the phone calls between us have stopped and neither of us have made any travel plans to visit each other. We both know it’s over.

But I’m not feeling sad because tonight you are I have arranged to do one of our after work movies in the usual ‘just friends hanging out’ mode. The day has really dragged for me but five o’clock has finally rolled around so I retire to the Ladies room to shed my business clothes and change into something more relaxed for the evening.

I’m feeling more than usually particular about how I’ll look tonight. It’s hot in the city — one of those ‘dog days’ of summer when you wish you could come to work wearing the flimsiest clothes you have. So I change into a light cotton summer dress and sandals.

I don’t want to feel encumbered or trapped this evening. It’s a time for me to breathe, to feel free, to risk. The straps on my dress show off my nicely tanned shoulders, always one of my best features. I apply the slightest touch of gloss to my lips, a little eyeliner, and a dab of perfume behind my ears.

Of course, you’re blissfully unaware of my plans but I have to admit that I’m a little excited about what might happen tonight. There’s a frisson of anticipation, a slight but pleasurable level of nervous tension. And there’s a secret to my preparations that thrills me the most.

Tonight is a no pantie night.

As we leave work to walk to the movie theater you’re talking about how glad you are that we’re taking in an early show because you’re meeting a friend later for a drink. You apologize for not being able to have our usual post-movie chat and tell me you have to leave soon after it ends for your appointment.

I know that ‘friend’ is someone you’ve been seeing for a while and, though you’d never dream of telling me, I sense that you’re intimate with her. What you don’t know is that now I want to be the ‘friend’ you see, the one you look forward to touching, caressing and laughing with.

I don’t remember that much about the movie because I’m too preoccupied with what’s going to happen once it’s over. There’s no need for you to walk me home afterwards but, as usual, you do that, purely because you like my company. It’s not a male protection thing, you just want an excuse to try to make me laugh one more time, a last chance to find out what’s on my mind. So we leave the theater and stroll through the warm evening air, chatting about ‘stuff’ as we get closer to my apartment.

I can feel the cotton fabric of my dress moving over my skin and am very aware of my no pantie status. There’s a warm evening breeze and occasionally it steals up my skirt to caress my thighs. My pubic hairs tingle as the air brushes over them and occasionally they brush against the inside of my dress as we’re walking home. When that happens my labia tightens slightly in pleasure. I feel my lips get just that little bit puffier.

A pleasing wetness begins to lubricate me as I walk. I imagine my lips glistening slightly, shining as if they’re covered in dewdrops.

Of course, you’re oblivious to all this as you stroll beside me, chatting of future movies you’d like to catch.

Outside my building you thank me for taking in the film with you and begin to turn away to keep your date.

“Actually” I say, “would you mind coming up just for a minute? There’s something I want to talk to you about.”

I can see a quick expression of concern flash across your face and your eyes open a little wider as you worry that I’m in sort of trouble. But a simple ‘of course’ is all you say. Always the dependable friend.

We ride the elevator up to my floor and don’t say much to each other. I’m feeling a tension in that small space but know that you’re blissfully unaware of there being anything different about the evening. To you it’s just a quick chat before you go to your lover. I didn’t even say ‘would you like to come up for coffee?’ for God’s sake.

The elevator opens and as I walk to my door my hands are shaking a little. Somehow it’s a bit more difficult than usual for me to put the key in the lock and to turn it to the left. But I manage it and in we go.

“Fancy a drink?” I ask but you reply, “No, I’m fine”.

I know you’re thinking about not being late for your appointment with your ‘friend’.

“There’s something I saw online that I just wanted to get your reaction to,” I say. “It’ll only take a second.”

I signal you to come over to the table in the living room where I keep my laptop. A couple of clicks and I’ve pulled up my Facebook page.

“I just wanted to show you this,” I say and move the cursor to the heart icon marking my relationship status. As usual it reads ‘in a relationship’.

“Okay,” you say non-committedly. You’re obviously wondering what the hell’s going on.

“Now pay close attention,” I order.

As you watch I click on the icon and with a few taps I delete the phrase ‘in a relationship’. Then I type in the word ‘single’.

“Remember you asking me to let you know if my status ever changed?” I ask.

“Well, it just did.”

You’re looking a bit confused, uncertain by what this all means. I can tell you’ve been taken by surprise. You’re clearly caught off guard, trying to process what exactly this all means.

I straighten up and turn to face you directly.

“You know,” I murmur as look straight into your eyes, “I’ve been wondering if maybe you’d like to stay with me tonight?”

The silence that follows is deafening. It’s as if the whole world has stopped and is waiting to hear your response.

There’s a long pause and a serious expression quietly settles on your face, one that I’ve never seen before. I think you sense that how you reply is going to have serious implications for you.

Then you look, oh so intensely, straight at me. I see a strange mixture of longing and gratitude in your eyes and a warm flush goes through me. I don’t need to hear you answer my question because I know it already. But you break the silence anyway and there’s a soft, almost croaked, response from you.

“I would…really…really…love that.”

Then, “do you mind if I make a quick call?”

You walk into the kitchen looking for some privacy.

Ever considerate, I know you’re going to let your ‘friend’ know that you can’t make it tonight. You don’t want her standing alone, waiting for you while she wonders what’s happening. I wonder what you’re going to say to her? I force myself not to move closer to try and listen.

During the couple of minutes or so you’re on the phone I do my best to compose myself but the butterflies in my stomach are colliding with each other. I can’t ever remember a situation in which I’ve basically offered sex to someone I’ve already come to know as a friend. Usually sex happens after a man has pursued, romanced and seduced me, with his intentions always being very clear.

When you come back into the room I have a sudden attack of shyness. I look down but you catch my chin and raise my face up to look directly into yours.

“I never thought this would happen but I’m so glad it is,” you say.

Your hands take mine and we stand facing each other taking in this moment. Neither of us knows what this evening will mean for us but I sense that in some way it’s going to be significant.

You place your hands on the outside of my wrists and then slowly move them up the outside of my arms caressing my skin. They’re so warm! You must be burning up with desire. You reach my shoulders and glide your palms gently over them. It feels very sensual. You look directly at me and, because of the intensity I see in your eyes, having my shoulders stroked suddenly feels very intimate.

I catch my breath as your hands slide back down the outside of my arms. I see pleasure all over your face, but also other things — confidence, desire and purpose. It’s clear you’re in no rush and, once again, our eyes meet. Again, you look intently at me.

“Are you sure this is what you want?” you ask me.

“I’m sure.”

I appreciate that you’re trying to make sure I’m not making a rash decision I’ll regret tomorrow morning. What you don’t know is that as spring turned to summer and my old relationship faded a lot of that was down to you. I looked forward to your company in a way that wasn’t there any more with my boyfriend. Tonight has actually been a long time coming.

I guess you’re satisfied with my response and know that I really want this evening to happen.

You walk me over to the sofa and sit down before gently pulling me down to sit on your lap. I’m perched at a sideways angle to you, quite prim and proper really. I could be a schoolgirl or daughter waiting for fatherly advice. My legs are closed and it’s a very demure tableau.

I turn my head toward you and look directly into your eyes. There it is. The longing you’ve kept buried for these last ten months is now blazing directly out at me, warming me and causing my own temperature to rise.

I move my face down towards yours.

This is it, the moment of truth. This first kiss will be everything. I’ll know in an instant if the evening is going to go anywhere close to where I want it to go. But there’s a quiet certainty inside me telling me that everything will be all right.

Our lips meet and I feel a current of desire transmitting between us. We both just seem to graze against each other’s mouth. The tingle is electric. Your lips feel so soft, so full, and you part them slightly as you brush them over mine.

We kiss gently, you moving your face so that your lips can settle on different parts of mine. You run your tongue over my mouth to moisten me and then our lips glide over each other’s. Softly we brushing against the sensitive nerve endings that lie just underneath our skin.

This kind of soft kissing feels so erotically charged. There’s no thrusting tongues ramming down throats, none of the hungry chomping so characteristic of movie scenes. You just seem to know implicitly that what thrills me the most is to feel your soft lips running gently over mine.

So we slide together dancing over each other’s moist lips in such a tenderly erotic way. Occasionally one of gives a little nibble of the other’s bottom lip and we both laugh.

No first kiss has ever had this effect on me before. With no instruction manual we both seem to know instinctively what will please the other. It’s a wonderfully unplanned sensual coming together, a shared desire for a gentle brushing, a moist lingering, a soft touching of tongues from parted mouths.

I feel myself stir and tighten inside and hear breath quickening and small sighs escaping. Is it you or me who’s making those quiet sounds? Right now I don’t care because I’m sliding to the edge of desire, feeling like I want to open myself to you in the most intimate way I can.

Or, if I’m really honest, I want you to open me up in the same sensual and gentle way you’re kissing me. I can tell you’re going to take your time with me. There’s going to be no rush to orgasm, no hurtling to the moment you get your rocks off. I’ve known from your humor that you like to tease. Now I sense excitedly that you’re going to tease me in a whole different, very delicious, way.

Without saying anything you move me off your lap and stand up. You reach your hand down to mine and pull me up off the coach so we stand face to face. Slowly you slide the straps of my dress down my shoulders and I see a smile cross your face. I never thought a man could look at my body so intently that it would make me feel completely naked even when fully clothed. Waves of heat seem to emanate from your eyes and warm my shoulders.

You start to kiss each of my shoulders. It feels so tender, so loving. I turn my head slightly upwards and to the side so you can kiss up my neck. Up you go, alternating small licks with your kisses. I let out a slight sigh of pleasure and her a quiet moan, almost of pain, escape from you. The desire smoldering in you for the last now months is unleashing itself.

Your eyes hold my gaze very steadily as you slowly lower my dress down me. You’re undressing me so tenderly, so gently, so appreciatively. You raise your eyebrows slightly, implicitly asking me the question, “is it okay if I do this?”

I look directly back at you and give a tiny nod.

You slide the dress down over my breasts and I can feel my nipples harden as the fabric grazes against them. The tops of my breasts appear and you kiss their skin lightly to mark the moment. Moving my dress down my chest just a couple of inches has sent a powerful charge through my body.

Suddenly all I want to do is be naked in front of you. I’m desperate for my breasts to be exposed to the warm night air. Sensing this you pull the dress further down my arms and there they are. Round, soft and full, their nipples stiffening as they wait for the attention they know is coming.

I don’t even need to wonder if you’re going to be a grabber. I know what you’ll do. And here you are doing it! You gently caress one breast, then the other, and I hear you sigh as you do so.

“So beautiful.” Is that what I hear you murmur?

But before I can ask you kiss my lips softly as you slowly massage each of my globes. It feels so wonderful to have you take your time with me, for your hands to cup and rub each breast in turn as your lips brush across my mouth. You become a wonderful human bra, squeezing me, massaging me, all the time kissing me softly.

Now I can tell that you’re starting to squirm. Your body is twisting ever so slightly, and it’s obvious to me that you’re in a state of deep arousal. I know that right now you’re on fire.

But, and this is so great, you don’t guide my hand to your groin, or strip my dress hurriedly off me. It’s clear you’ve decided that giving me pleasure, making me feel good, is what’s on your mind. I guess I’ve always sensed that for you giving pleasure to someone – seeing them laugh, making them feel good — is what pleases you the most.

So you pull my dress down to my waist and your hands are all over my upper body. Oh! They’re so deliciously warm. You stroke my arms, caress my back, massage my shoulders and then draw my chest directly to yours so you can kiss me as my breasts brush against the fabric of your shirt. My nipples are now completely erect and extremely sensitive. I honestly don’t know if I could bear them to be touched anymore.

Slowly you unbutton your shirt, all the while looking directly into my eyes. You kiss me softly and pull me to you, so that my breasts press gently on your skin. This is so sensual, our two naked chests gliding slowly back and forth across each other, the side of my breasts occasionally brushing against your shirt.

Reaching down to the bottom of my dress you pull it up a few inches. My vagina feels so deliciously naked and exposed under the fabric. And what makes it even more delicious is the fact that you don’t know I’m completely bare down there!

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